I grew up with He-Man. At the time, there was just about nothing cooler I could have been doing with my 3-year-old time than making He-Man action figures kamikaze jump from my bunk bed. As I got older, I definitely graduated to the world of Ninja Turtles, but I always remembered He-Man fondly.
That is, until that wretched Masters of the Universe movie came out. It was like a putrid whirlwind of stink that crushed all that was cool about He-Man inside my head. Now, to be fair, live action adaptations of super heroes and the likes have come a long way with the graces of awesome special effects. However, I’m not sure there’s much redemption for the old cartoon after it was desecrated by bad movie disease.
So, what’s worse than the terrible He-Man film that we all changed the channel to watch Tremors in spite of? Well, He-Man costumes. I’d actually insert this beastly concoction into the category of ugly and awful all in one. Do I need to break it down. The equation of the late 70’s hairdo reminiscent of the stuff you’d see on Different Strokes, plus the armor made up of basically a few leather straps and a Speedo, all multiplied by the grossness of the fur that makes up the Speedo… /sigh. It’s a mess all together.
At least he has a cool sword and fierce pet tiger/lion/panther/something-from-the-same-species-as-cat friend. So tonight, the Coalition for the Appreciation of Random, Strange, Awful, or Ugly Costumes tips their hat to this stinking woofness that is a costume.
Hey, maybe someone could pull it off in a cool modern movie remake? Hmm, nope. Wait, robot He-Man? Yes! YES!
Much more acceptable — I’d buy this for one of my kids maybe?